Last Day of January

There are days it feels like changing habits is a journey of two steps forward and three steps back. I started 2010 full of joy and hope eager to bring new focus to different areas of my life. Isn't that why we accept crazy changes, the hope of change.

The third week was more of a struggle. I was discouraged and there didn't seem time to keep my new routines going. One missed day lead to another missed day. I still feel discouraged. Things I wanted to do I kept putting off because "there is always tomorrow." Tomorrow is February and they're still not done. I feel tired and discouraged. I feel like I am walking backwards. Changing life habits is hard. Adding new things, even good things is hard. It means cutting other stuff out of my life, some times the things that go are even good things. I can't knit and read at the same time. I can't cook and visit friends at the same time.

January wasn't a total write off, even in my discouragement there were joys and success. I read less than I wanted but I still got some books read (or listened to). Last week I made my own "natural" cleaning supplies. I joined a writing group who I think will encourage me to edit and finish my novel. And from my routine changing it seems making my bed and eating breakfast has become a daily habits. February I am going to be focusing on what I eat and adding exercises to my life.

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